NYC 1 300x200 POSITIVE PARENTING   A NEW CHAPTER

 

One thing is very clear. I have not had to change a diaper in over 12 years. That’s how old my youngest is. My other two kids are 32 and 21.

Those were very nice times when they were babies and they needed the help of their parents 24 hours a day.

Babies are the nicest creatures of our species. They smell nice. They are cuddly and they do the cutest things. All of which make us love them more and more.

I have three boys and it was a great experience to be there at the hospital when they were born. Due to the condition I have called “squeamishness” I was never able to be in the delivery room. I was, however, there in the recovery rooms. I was always amazed how those big babies (all three weighed in over 10 lbs.)   fit in their mothers’ bodies. I have a lot of respect for all mothers and what they go through during child birth.

My parenting experience in those early years was routine. I changed diapers, made formula and said “no” more times than I care to remember. I understood that being a parent was important and I take my job very seriously.

Most of my parenting techniques came from what I saw my parents do. They were my template for what positive parenting is.

My one negative experience occurred during my oldest son’s early years. I was, during that time, in the throngs of alcoholism and drug abuse. He was around 8 when I entered a rehab and I have been sober and clean ever since. My other 2 boys have only heard me talk about those times. By God’s Grace, they will never have firsthand knowledge of experiencing a parent who suffers from the disease of substance abuse.

I never wanted to force my boys to become “professional” athletes. I always felt that it was important for them to find their own paths. I felt and still feel that it is unfair to force kids to become what their parents couldn’t.

We all went to basketball and baseball games but I always used those outings only as to means to be together. I want these kids to get along with each other and as brothers I also needed them to learn how to help one another.

I feel that my approach has been pretty successful because it does appear that they enjoy each other’s company and they miss each other when they are not together.

As I stated earlier, the older boys are 32 and 21. They work and are moving on with their lives. The 12 year old is continuing to grow and this year he will be going to the 6th grade.

Although the 12 year old still needs help here and there, he travels to and from school on his own and I just recently found out that he can cook his own breakfast.

It is apparent that my parenting job is moving into another direction. I no longer have to worry about how they cross the street or what time they go to bed. Staying out of trouble, though, will always be a parent’s concern.

It is important to acknowledge the roles that their mothers have played in their lives.  I have 2 kids from one mom and 1 kid from another and although we have experienced differences of opinion, both moms want the best for their kids and that was where we agree completely. Both moms have done a great job with these kids.

With 2 grown and 1 growing up, I feel that it’s time for me to start working on me. In a few years, I’ll be retiring. I’ll be 63 this year and I feel that I’ll be able to go work 2 more years. We’ll see.

What will I do with myself?

I’m too old to become an athlete. Sometimes I have a hard time walking. These old bones are not what they used to be.

Maybe I could become a rocket scientist. That wouldn’t work. It would take a lot of time for me to catch up with something that I have never done or was interested in.

I think I will continue with this blog. I’ve been writing for almost 6 years and this has been a real joy. It’s been great writing about all my experiences that go with being a dad.

I have been taking some online classes that I hope will improve my writing skills. I have also taken classes in web design. With these new skills hopefully I’ll be able to improve the I Love Being a Dad website.

I have never thought that my role of being a dad will end. I do believe that my role is changing and it will be fun to see what these young men become. I have high hopes for all of three.

I have for the past few years been called “grandpa” and I’m sure my 3 grandkids will bring new challenges for me to experience. That is what will keep me young. I also get to spoil them before they have to go back to their mom. That is one of the benefits of being “grandpa”.

I’m the guy whose glass is always 1/2 full.

I LOVE BEING A DAD!!

One comment on “POSITIVE PARENTING – A NEW CHAPTER

  • The thing that is pretty amazing about parenthood is that as the children grow, we too grow. There is always something new to Learn. The relationships change but often grow deeper and much more meaningful. Enjoy your journey as you transition from disciplinarian to mentor.

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